I Want a Behind the Scenes Man

Of course, I do not know all of the factors that go into a man determining whether or not he is attracted to a woman. As women we all have experienced that man staring at us like we are a piece of pork chop on a plate. Hell, the beauty and clothing industry makes “gazillion’s” […]

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Help! My man is a “chick magnet”!

I was chatting with a friend recently and this scenario came up. Because it provoked some thought and self-reflection for me I wanted to bring the scenario to you. So, here you go… You walk into an event with your man who happens to be blessed with “chick magnet” genes. Translation… your man is “FINE”! […]

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Meghan Markle Hit the Jackpot

Just like every other woman on the planet, I was tuned in for the royal wedding. Most women (and maybe even some men) love a storybook romance. Mesmerized by the beauty and splendor of the union between this beautiful couple, many of us focused in on every expression shared between them, trying to confirm that […]

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Cause I’m A Woman

The twenty something Tonza (as she smiles gleefully): The forty something Tonza (as I give myself the side eye): WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD I TAKE ALL OF THAT ON? Anyone remember the saying, “be careful what you wish for”? It seems to be playing like a broken record in my head as I think […]

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DIVORCED…NOT DEVASTATED

I am excited to announce that I am 1 of 11 authors in a new book, DIVORCED…NOT DEVASTATED. This book is a compilation of unique stories by women who emerged triumphant after divorce. While the stories in this compilation center around our divorce journeys, DIVORCED…NOT DEVASTATED would be a wonderful read for anyone that has […]

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The Shift

I found myself in a constant state of anger, always ready for war. Taking the easy way out, I blamed my raging hormones and accepted that this was something I had to endure and manage through medication, meditation, and mindfulness. Unable to shake the feeling of defeat at the thought of taking medication, I immersed […]

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Is That What You Call Cheating?

I got a lot of great feedback from my post, Monogamy…is that even possible?. The feedback, and reflection on my personal journey, led to another question. What is cheating? I think there is a huge disparity in how men and women define cheating. Or is it just a disparity in how cheaters vs. non-cheaters define […]

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Monogamy…is that even possible?

You say you got a girl And how you want me How you want me when you got a girl? The feelin’ is wreckless Of knowin’ you’re selfish Knowin’ I’m desperate Gettin’ all in your love Fallin’ all over love, like Do it to last, last Hanging out the back, all up in your lap […]

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I Am Enough

Every day as I get ready for work I see the words “I am enough”. I had this phrase inscribed on my body almost two years ago, during my period of transition.  At the time that I decided to make this phrase a permanent part of my life I really didn’t believe that I was […]

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I am a Feminist (but, I like a man who is chivalrous)

In this quest for equality as women have we led men to believe that we no longer desire a chivalrous man at our side? If so, men please accept my apology for the role that I have played in the confusion.  Sure, I want equal pay and equal access to opportunities. I want to be […]

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