I Want a Behind the Scenes Man

Of course, I do not know all of the factors that go into a man determining whether or not he is attracted to a woman. As women we all have experienced that man staring at us like we are a piece of pork chop on a plate. Hell, the beauty and clothing industry makes “gazillion’s” […]

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Help! My man is a “chick magnet”!

I was chatting with a friend recently and this scenario came up. Because it provoked some thought and self-reflection for me I wanted to bring the scenario to you. So, here you go… You walk into an event with your man who happens to be blessed with “chick magnet” genes. Translation… your man is “FINE”! […]

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You Know You Are Approaching Fifty When…

The other day my friend asked me, “do you realize we graduated from high school thirty years ago?” I. ALMOST. PASSED. OUT! Thirty years??? Where has all of the time gone? Of course, we would love to be able to turn back the hands of time, and, tweak a few things, but, the more we […]

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Meghan Markle Hit the Jackpot

Just like every other woman on the planet, I was tuned in for the royal wedding. Most women (and maybe even some men) love a storybook romance. Mesmerized by the beauty and splendor of the union between this beautiful couple, many of us focused in on every expression shared between them, trying to confirm that […]

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Cause I’m A Woman

The twenty something Tonza (as she smiles gleefully): The forty something Tonza (as I give myself the side eye): WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD I TAKE ALL OF THAT ON? Anyone remember the saying, “be careful what you wish for”? It seems to be playing like a broken record in my head as I think […]

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Tonza D. Ruffin

I am a single mother, daughter, and attorney living in Bertie County, a small town in Eastern North Carolina. Growing up I moved back and forth between the Bronx and Bertie County,  so my personality is a little bit city and a little bit country (although I prefer the term southern). After being back in […]

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This is America

So now it appears that peaceful protests are a thing of the past. At least, if you are in the NFL. In response to NFL players stance on police brutality and racial profiling, the NFL “powers that be” have come up with a rule that says if the players are on the field during the […]

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DIVORCED…NOT DEVASTATED

I am excited to announce that I am 1 of 11 authors in a new book, DIVORCED…NOT DEVASTATED. This book is a compilation of unique stories by women who emerged triumphant after divorce. While the stories in this compilation center around our divorce journeys, DIVORCED…NOT DEVASTATED would be a wonderful read for anyone that has […]

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My Journey Along the Way

As promised, here are three things about me that many of you never knew: 1. I wanted to be a Women’s Studies professor. Years ago, when I had only 1 daughter, I thought my life was heading in a different direction. I envisioned a life where we lived in a quiet college/university community, and, I […]

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Women/Young Ladies that Inspire Me

Hi everyone!! I really have missed blogging over the past couple of weeks.  Court demands, and, other projects have been consuming so much of  my time. Anyway, I have decided to dedicate my next couple of blog posts to sharing more information about me, Tonza D. Ruffin :-). To kick this project off, here are three […]

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